Wounds of a Friend
The first friend described is Eliphaz. He uses flawed reasoning. I began with one of most common mistakes. He says, “I understand.” He most certainly does not. It is always a mistake to say that we understand. We may have had a similar experience, but we never truly understand what another person is going through.
Further, Eliphaz assumes that God is just, and that Job certainly could not be. Hear his arguments:
4:17, 5:17 “Can a mortal be more righteous than God? Can even a strong man be more pure than his Maker? 17 “Blessed is the one whom God corrects; so, do not despise the discipline of the Almighty.
Thus, Job is guilty of sin. He also said that all of Job’s speech is motivated by sin. (15:5)
5 Your sin prompts your mouth; you adopt the tongue of the crafty.
Eliphaz accuses Job of being sinful as opposed to the righteousness of God. Every word Job spoke, according to Eliphaz, was a result of sin. The idea is that Job is prideful, guilty, and worthy of condemnation.
Hardly comforting! Even if sin brings on the suffering of another, do we need to point it out.
The assault of Eliphaz continues as he accuses Job of gross indifference to the needs of others. He charges Job with ignoring the needs of others (22:5-10)
5 Is not your wickedness great? Are not your sins endless? 6 You demanded security from your relatives for no reason; you stripped people of their clothing, leaving them naked. 7 You gave no water to the weary and you withheld food from the hungry, 8 though you were a powerful man, owning land— an honored man, living on it. 9 And you sent widows away empty-handed and broke the strength of the fatherless. 10 That is That is why snares are all around you, why sudden peril terrifies you,
The language of Eliphaz is specific. He says that Job’s motives are flawed. He is sinful in his business dealings, in demanding security from his neighbors and in rejecting the needy. The verb tense used by Eliphaz indicated that he believes Job’s sinful actions to be ongoing.
The last passage I will highlight transitions to Eliphaz’ advise. He suggests that Job should repent of his sinfulness. (22:22-24)
22 Accept instruction from his mouth and lay up his words in your heart. 23 If you return to the Almighty, you will be restored: If you remove wickedness far from your tent 24 and assign your nuggets to the dust, your gold of Ophir to the rocks in the ravines,
His call is clear. Repent. Turn from your wickedness. He promises that Job would be restored if he returns. He challenges Job to consider his treasure as nothing more than dust. By putting his emphasis on the right things Eliphaz assures Job that he will be restored.
Next on the stage is Bildad. His approach is in no way subtle. He directly confronts Job, asserting that if Job were truly righteous, He would listen. (8:4-6)
4 When your children sinned against him, he gave them over to the penalty of their sin. 5 But if you will seek God earnestly and plead with the Almighty, 6 if you are pure and upright, even now he will rouse himself on your behalf and restore you to your prosperous state.
I will not point out many of Bildad’s words, but these demonstrate the depth of his disgusting attack. There are no more revolting words than those in verse four. He says that Job’s children got what they had coming. They were guilty of sin and got what they had coming.
Truthfully, would anything he said to job have a possibility of gaining a hearing after that attack. It is doubtful Job would respond to the truth stated in verse six that God would respond if Job would only listen. He also would not hear Job’s words in verse twenty.
20 “Surely God does not reject one who is blameless or strengthen the hands of evildoers
He offers Job hope but only on the terms he perceives. He says that God will not support wrongdoing. He will not cast away the blameless. In his underhanded way he says that Job is guilty of sin. He implies that Job is neither innocent nor blameless.
Finally, Job is “Comforted” by Zophar. He simply could not resist the urge to confront Job. (11:1-3)
Then Zophar the Naamathite replied: 2 “Are all these words to go unanswered? Is this talker to be vindicated? 3 Will your idle talk reduce others to silence? Will no one rebuke you when you mock?
He feels compelled to confront what he perceives as Job’s wickedness. Fills in the silence of God, speaking as a prophet. He claims to speak truth, to have all knowledge and to speak for God. (See 33:3-5)
He says that Job could not possibly understand the mysteries of God. (11:7) “Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty?” He almost pities Job saying, “You just don’t understand.”
We would do well to understand exactly what motivated Zophar. What motivated his approach? Zophar clarifies his motives. (20:1-4)
Then Zophar the Naamathite replied: 2 “My troubled thoughts prompt me to answer because I am greatly disturbed. 3 I hear a rebuke that dishonors me, and my understanding inspires me to reply. 4 “Surely you know how it has been from of old, ever since mankind was placed on the earth,
In this section Zophar reveals far more than he might have wished. Far from being motivated by a desire to correct Job, Zophar is motivated by a damaged self-esteem. He is more concerned about his wounded honor than the honor of God. We must ever guard our motives when we seek to “comfort” our friends. It is not about us.
Words That Comfort
Not all their words were harmful. They did offer some messages of hope. Bildad was direct, challenging, and hopeful. Elihu spoke of God’s sovereignty.
I call your attention to the hope filled words of Eliphaz. (5:17-27)
17 “Blessed is the one whom God corrects; so, do not despise the discipline of the Almighty. 18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal. 19 From six calamities he will rescue you; in seven no harm will touch you. 20 In famine he will deliver you from death, and in battle from the stroke of the sword. 21 You will be protected from the lash of the tongue, and need not fear when destruction comes. 22 You will laugh at destruction and famine and need not fear the wild animals. 23 For you will have a covenant with the stones of the field, and the wild animals will be at peace with you. 24 You will know that your tent is secure; you will take stock of your property and find nothing missing. 25 You will know that your children will be many, and your descendants like the grass of the earth. 26 You will come to the grave in full vigor, like sheaves gathered in season. 27 “We have examined this, and it is true. So, hear it and apply it to yourself.”
Lessons for the Journey
- Friendship is a process and a journey. We walk with people through this process. It is never simple. We must accept that both we and they are on a journey. Just walk with them.
- Be careful about generalizing and assuming. We dare not assume someone’s motives or actions. We do not know what they have been through or what they feel. We can leave all judgment to God.
- All friends come with their own private issues. Our motives are never as pure as we would like. Walk with them anyway. Acknowledge your issues as clearly as you can. Give room for your faults, and theirs.
- Friendship is incomplete without God. The only hope we have for our walk with others is relying on God to help us love and be loved.
